Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Grief

My maternal grandfather's death was the first time sorrow and grief touched my life. Fourteen years later, I am stronger, having seen more, having lost more loved ones. But on 27 June each year I am reminded of the first person I ever had to say goodbye to.





Why do we grieve? We do not grieve for the person who is gone. He or she is already free and, I believe, in a place where yearnings are unknown. We grieve for ourselves. For that smile we will never see again. For that support we will never find again. For that conversation we will never have again. For that companion we will never meet again on earth. The person who is no more is at peace. It is we who are left to wander, to drift, to seek endlessly for that peace in this life, which is waiting for us, if we would only let it be.



More than God, I believe it is the loved ones who walk this earth no more who look out for me. I imagine each of my well-wishers as a guardian angel, fervently wishing me happiness. I do not need to worship them like I would a God. A loving memory is all I need. And from that I can draw strength in all my hopes and dreams. There are good spirits out there who sincerely want what is best for me.


Each precious soul who no longer lives is a star in my sky, looking out for me, shining down and brightening up my way, occasionally playing hide-and-seek, but always, always, emerging to guide my steps in infinite wisdom. And to know that is to walk in peace.

14 comments:

La Hormiguita Cantora said...

I haven't lost any member of my family yet, only almost-unknown uncles and similar. So, I don't want to live this experience very soon. I can't even imagine the pain...

Have a nice week

Anamika said...

Hi, thanks for the comment. And I hope you don't have to face this any time soon either! :)

La Hormiguita Cantora said...

hi, thanks for the visit! my main blog has translations of all the last posts in english so you can go there with no problems ;)

http://ratoneando.blogspot.com

Ankit said...

I guess the last para sums it all.

I havn't yet lost anyone significant enough to cause me pain(great great grand mother didnt leave much of an impact on me, hardly knew her).

But I can understand the pain. We remember the good times, the memories and move on eventually. One of the greatest gifts we have are our dreams and we can always meet anyone we want there.

I'm sure his soul is resting in peace

rishabh said...

The last comment was by me. Just have 2 ID's :)

iz said...

I'm so sorry. SOmetimes I think how I'll handle my grandmother's death and even teh thought of it upsets me. Even though logically I'm prepared for it.

Anamika said...

Ankit/Rishabh: thanks. why are you schizophrenic on the Net? :)

Iz: I know what you mean. Sometimes I anticipate grief too when a loved one is unwell, it's only human to do that!

rishabh said...

Trust me, the real reason is quite pathetic!
BTW I updated my blog.

the mad momma said...

how beautifully you put it anna...

Mystic Margarita said...

Beautiful post. I lost my father when I was barely 10, so I know how painful it is to miss your loved one's company.

Anamika said...

Mad Momma: Glad I could make it sound beautiful. It has to, doesn't it, for us to want to believe it?

Mystic: You have been through grief far greater than mine, if quantifying it is even possible. Thanks for commenting.

gulshan aunty said...

Death. Is part of Life. Period. Glad you have your guardian angels.

Now! Miss TC/HM/TC! You're a fine teapot calling A/R schizophrenic!!! Here am scrambling around on all your blogs, searching for Grandma instead of girls in lifts, and you're confusing me further? Huuurrmmph!!!

Anamika said...

Aunty G: I am the blackest of black teapots, and I apologise! But this way I got you to notch up the visitor count on all my blogs (heh heh heh)!

gulshan aunty said...

NEVER MIND!!!